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Lightdragons · Dec 4, 2021 8:09 AM

I'm a mom of two little boys (2 years and 2 months) and I am going to ride a friend's horse today! It will be the first time I have ridden in over a year and oh man the anxiety is getting to me. I was excited more than nervous, but right now the nerves are winning. Its not that I don't think I can ride. I know I can, I've worked riding horses and have been riding on and off for 16 years. And For some of those year wher I wasn't riding I was still around horses. Currently I have a mini horse who I tried training to cart but came to the conclusion she doesn't want to and if I made her it would be incredibly unsafe. So that was a bummer. My other equine is a cute grade pony who turns 3 in May or April and I'd love to teach her to cart, she's more bomb proof and trusts me. But now I'm lacking confidence and don't know if I should try with her too. Ive never had any training with driving horses and ive driven a mini once. I am trying to read and watch videos to teach myself but I don't think I can do it. M budget to send either girl to a trainer is at zero. I adore my ponies but am really struggling. I grew up moving through horses fairly quickly to suit my skills. Whether my parent bought them, leased them, or it was just the horse my trainer had me riding consistently at a time. However my husband and his family don't really sell animals and more so view them as forever pets. Which I think is really cool. But I miss riding and obviously I can't ride a mini and she won't cart so she's a cute pasture ornament. And my pony is 11 hands at 2.5 years. So too small for me to ride and I don't really have the connections to find a kid who could help train her for riding. I'm so torn on whether I keep them, sell one or both and get a riding horse.

Wow this turned into a pity party ramble. I'm sorry for sharing my woes but I needed get it out there.

Blaze5115 · Dec 4, 2021 10:10 AM

Here’s a strangers views on buying and selling horses.

In 2019 I adopted my first BLM mustang. He was a decent horse, but me and him didn’t click. I can list a million reasons as to why I wanted to sell him but I can only name one or two as to why I should keep him. I had no idea what to do. Then believe it or not I saw a tweet

“Normalize selling horses that aren’t fitting for you instead of just keeping them forever and being miserable”

I listed him for sale that same day and he ended up with a gal who loves a whole heck of lot more then I ever did. I adopted another mustang a few months later and he’s my best friend.

I hope this helps in some tiny way. seeing that tweet really changed my perspective maybe it’ll help you too

WhiteValley · Dec 5, 2021 1:52 AM

Although I love horses I don't have any experience of owning them and limited experience of riding (and that was at least 40 years ago!). What I do have experience in, is being a mother and a grandmother. Your youngest child is only two months old. It's possible that your anxiety stems from giving birth. I'm not saying you have anything like post natal depression, but you are now having to deal with the needs of two young children and that is incredibly tiring and emotionally draining. Talk to someone, who is understanding, about your anxiety and see if it stems from anything specific. Don't forget that you can also turn to your HAJ family, we bring a wide range of experiences and we are all very supportive. :)

I hope you feel less anxious soon. I'm sending virtual hugs from across the 'pond'!

ConfluenceStable · Dec 5, 2021 7:26 AM

Please let us know how your ride went! I lived and worked for a large breeding/showing facility when I was in my 30s and was around and riding horses every day. That was 30 years ago. There have been several time that I've the opportunity to ride, since then, and I felt something similar.

{{{Horsey Hugs}}}

boredaf · Dec 7, 2021 11:31 AM

I tend to be a rather unanxious person even in situations were it would behoove me to be, like roofing. So I find it hard to relate, however I do know that I recently returned to hockey after not playing for years following highschool and it was one of the best choices I've made. The rust shakes off quicker than you'd think and you'll soon find yourself at home on your mount of choice *pets skates*

And on the brighside you don't have to deal with years of trashed cardio, that's the horse's problem ;) *needs to get back in shape*

Lightdragons · Dec 26, 2021 3:44 PM

Thank you all for sharing! My ride on my friends horse went great! Yes I was super out of shape but I still could do everything I wanted to do. :)

For my dilemma of the mini and pony. My husband and I took a risk and bought a horse at the local auction and sold the mini. I haven't ridden him yet but he's seen the vet and farrier the first week we had him. Haven't ridden him yet because of none of my tack fitting him and we spent the first while making the property large horse safe. Thank you for all of your advice <3

Lightdragons · Dec 26, 2021 3:45 PM

And he is a appy gelding 13 years old and he's sweet

ConfluenceStable · Dec 26, 2021 5:37 PM

Pics or it didn't happen! :P

Ammit · Dec 27, 2021 5:37 AM

Not everyone is comfortable posting pictures. We need to respect that. :)

ConfluenceStable · Dec 27, 2021 8:25 AM

Fair point. Apologies, Lightdragon!

Lightdragons · Dec 31, 2021 9:04 AM

https://www.facebook.com/groups/huntandjump/permalink/7022935327747351/

Facebook link to my post on him. I'll add some more of him in the comments bc he's cute.

Well I hopped on him right before I traveled to CA from OR. My sister took a pic of me right after I hopped on then turned around and he tossed me off. I did get back on and off a couple times. But I totally rushed it and he wasn't quite ready. Also I have no tack for him so I just hopped on with halter and lead rope.

Lightdragons · Dec 31, 2021 9:05 AM

And no worries, happy to share pics confluence!

Lightdragons · Jun 1, 2022 1:16 PM

Well update time!
Not the best outcome but one we are working on. He turned out to not be a great match for me. As much as I want him to work we haven't clicked. He's a worried and anxious fellow who has spent the past month with a trainer I like and trust. They have made some progress but he would benefit from someone who has a better skill set than me to work him through old fears . So he has been listed but no bites yet. Our pony is still the best girl. Toddler has hopped on her a couple times (kid doesn't steer and I lead them) and she has been awesome. I've also started ground driving and she's picked it up quickly! I haven't been able to work with her as much as I would have liked as we have been down to one car. (Truck troubles) Thankfully money hasn't been as tight (husband got a better job; money and work environment so he's happy) so that how we could send him to training. We are looking at a different horse out of state to bring home. It's been delayed a bit but honestly it looks like that might be for the best! Give us time to work on Truck issues and sort them out and see if we can't get the gelding sold before then. And my kid boys are so fun. Baby is crawling has 2 teeth and startled the crap out of me when he woke me up at 5 wanting to eat by crying (normal) and pulling up on his crib rails (first time and signal to lower the mattress). Toddler has been learning how to share attention and play with little brother. I still have anxiety but with the sun starting to come out and the rain taking a chill pill I've been able to get out and enjoy the sunshine. Or really go outside to see the pony in non soggy conditions. It's been a good day and I'm going to focus on the good things.

WhiteValley · Jun 2, 2022 2:40 AM

I'm so glad that you're starting to feel better about things. Sunshine certainly helps lift the spirits and getting outside in the fresh air has been proven to be beneficial to both physical and mental health. I hope things continue to improve and that you are enjoying the antics of your little boys. :)

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